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Powerlessness, is the worst feeling we can endure, it’s the lowest of vibrations we can be in. It’s also the one thing that shapes our prospective of reality, we’re born with a free soul, our job is to create, create our lives, our realities .
Our power of creating from the universe is attracted from our vibrations, thoughts, emotions, that determine what is manifested , if we are attracting from the vibration of powerlessness we will manifest a reality of more things to feel powerless about.
Let me give you something to think about, lets say you have an over bearing parent that puts you down no matter what you do or how well you do it. You feel powerless to please them, you feel worthless, which is a side effect of powerlessness. With this experience you may go through life wanting to please, wanting to impress, unfortunately choosing people who can’t be pleased, why do we do this? Because these are the people who feel most normal to you, this is the vibration we are used to .
Our experiences are not what mold our life as much as our “perspective” of the experience .
Example: as we grow up we learn quickly that we’re powerless against adults mainly our parent, they have the power, they feed us, clothe us, we trust them to keep us alive, even a child that is beaten by a parent will still cry for them when taken away, the child has a false sense of safeness, they are the only ones they know that have kept them living.
We learn a false sense of power very young, we throw a fit, stomp our feet, embarrass our parents in public, we learn this false sense of power, when the parent gives-in, when you get the candy that they’ve just said no to moments ago . That’s when you feel the imaginary power. Everyone wants to feel empowered, there’s true empowerment, and false empowerment.
You have a choice to eat carrots or you can eat peas, the child doesn’t want either but by getting to choose they feel a sense of power even though they don’t want either one, that’s a false sense of power.
Another much more somber example: would be a person in an abusive relationship feeling powerless against their abuser, then later feeling a false sense of power when they’re abuser is bagging for forgiveness, crying and pleading never to do it again, that’s when the person being abused feels power and with the craving for power they sometimes stay with their abuser, always searching for the next feeling of empowerment.
If you know your spouse is cheating on you …you’ve seen the texts, it’s very clear your partner is seeing someone else. You looked, you found the truth, the truth of your suspicions has made you feel sad, but somehow empowered by knowing the truth, but when confronting them, they take away your feeling of power when they deny it , saying it’s not true ” you’re wrong, you’re crazy”, Its right in front of your face, but it’s not about the cheating anymore it’s about the power. So instead of walking away from the situation you continue to snoop through their things. You want to catch them in the lie Why, Because you will be right, being right makes you feel empowered. Also you’re hoping they will be sorry and beg you for forgiveness and you will have even more power.
It’s hard to know when we’re feeling powerless if that’s what we’re use to feeling, so how do we take back our lives?
(1) By trusting yourself and only caring about how you feel, that may sound selfish and your right it is, however if you are sacrificing your happiness then you do not have power over your life, so being selfish is a good thing, giving yourself permission to feel good is empowerment .
(2)By paying close attention to your intentions example: I’m I wanting someone else to be wrong so I can be right, there should never be an “if” on these sentences, I will feel empowered… if I catch them, if they say sorry, if they give me what I want, anytime it’s up to someone else’s actions or conditions to make you feel empowered, you have given away all your power. Any power you feel is a false feeling of power it’s a condition of our upbringing , This kind of power is deceiving and keeps us in a state of powerlessness. It’s choosing the peas instead of the carrots knowing you don’t want either. By someone giving you choices to accept one thing or another knowing you don’t want either, you are not in a state of empowerment.
Empowerment is having the authority over one’s self.
(3) Awareness that you are the one responsible for your choices, understanding no one has the power to take away your power, understanding you gave them that power, rising above the idea of being a victim, letting go of your childhood, anger, resentment. taking control over all the choices for yourself. You can’t control other peoples actions but you can control your own.
Your thoughts create vibrations that create reality, and you have control over your thoughts. You have the power to redirect your thoughts and your feelings, creating a new reality , manifesting from the universe the things you want in your life, don’t give that power to anyone.
Have you ever thought of how we manifest our dreams, in dreams there’s no perception of time, you can be on a mountain and then suddenly you’re on a beach there is no sequence of events in a dream.
Dreams are manifested by vibration of thoughts we carry over from our waking space to are sleeping space.
Our dream state and awake state, are similar in that they are manifested from vibration of thoughts, so what does this mean, it means when we watch a scary movie it can cause a vibration an emotion and while sleeping we may manifest being chased by a monster.
You may have bills past due, feeling the world is caving in on us you so you may manifest a dream of wolves chasing you, or being suffocated, or you could feel like someone is after your job, and might manifest a dream of someone stabbing you in the back.
So like manifesting dreams with our thoughts we also manifest our reality, luckily not quite the same or as quickly otherwise we would manifest a lot of people being strangled.
Our thoughts can be and almost always are scattered just like our dreams, we may be thinking about what we’re having for dinner followed by being on vacation… when suddenly a person we can’t stand pops in our head…. all of these thoughts bring about emotions and vibrations that we’re not even aware of.
Under all these thoughts is an intention of desire, as “Abraham Hicks” often states we know what we don’t want there for we know what we do want, so why can’t we just think the thought we want and make it manifest in our lives.
We can learn more about how manifesting works by looking at how our dreams work, example out of all the things we thought about in our day we dreamt of someone chasing us after watching a scary movie, why did that manifest instead of a good thought dream?
because something resonated with us about the movie there was a strong vibration, emotion, we felt we were in the movie… It felt like it was happening to us in other words we kept the vibration of that emotion long enough to manifest a nightmare.
Keeping the vibration and the belief of a thought long enough without resistance to the idea can seem difficult But once we understand the laws of the universe, the rules of manifesting, it will become easier .
Understanding the laws of attraction and manifesting .
We are what we think about, What we feel, believe, vibrate.
We are what we’re non- resistant to what we are persistently thinking about.
So what does that mean ?
The law of attraction has no judgement good or bad, the law is obedient to these rules and will manifest in accordance with these rules. In other words if you don’t want something happening that’s happening, then the universe will feel your vibrations your emotion your persistent thoughts and abide by continuing to give you MORE Of THE THINGS YOU DON’T WANT HAPPENING... because that is the dominant vibration.
You want more money what should your dominant vibration be?
What is the difference between vibration and thoughts? if you think the thought of wanting money you probably will have the vibration of not having any, you need the vibration of ” having…” to attract a vibration of having money think the thoughts of when you had money.
I have done this by thinking about when I got a birthday card as a kid and seen grandma had put $20.00 in it, there is a vibration of abundance in that thought, the universe don’t know $20 or a million dollars it only knows the vibration you felt when receiving… and it continues manifesting things that give you that same vibration its the law of physics.
Find a thought that gives the feeling of the vibration you want. If you want a loving relationship you need to find the vibration of having that relationship, using the persistent thoughts that brings about that vibration long enough will manifest it in your life. you may not remember having that feeling but think back even if you were ten and someone had a crush on you, how did it feel? hold on to that vibration. use your imagination . We are what we are non-resistant to” meaning if you have the vibration of having something you will continue to manifest having it, If this thought is interrupted with thoughts like ” This stuff don’t work ” then you will get the vibration of “this stuff don’t work ” and manifest more of “this stuff don’t work”.
Here’s a short cut :
Stop thinking or at least stop resonating with thought, There is a lot of power in being present without thought you become at peace, and non-resistant, letting your inner desire manifest.
There are many self help books and spiritual gurus that believe when clearing the mind like in meditation you’re on filtering the mind and allowing, manifesting is about allowing. ” Eckhart Tolle” author of “Power of Now” suggest not thinking or only thinking in the practical sense, while giving up the babbling narrator of our mind, this can be challenging for a lot of people Eckhart describes the rambling thoughts as the “evil ego” demanding our attention.
If you can catch yourself in thoughts before the thought brings about a negative vibration that manifest more negative vibration then you intercept a negative manifestation .
Being present can be exuberating there is such a clarity in being present, you will start to notice the world in a very different way .
Instead of giving out all kinds of thoughts to the universe by obsessive thinking you’re listening for the universe to give you its thoughts, feeling, and beliefs. You can only hear the universe by being quite.
So how to stop the cycle of thoughts, that are manifesting things you don’t want.
First: Awareness that you’re thinking obsessively; awareness is like an eraser, the minute you’re aware of the undesired thought it starts to be erased . Example: you’ve just realized you are thinking about having no money you can stop the thought just by realizing the thought . the vibration starts to be erased, Next: replace the thought with a new thought of appreciation, something like I am so appreciative of the clothes I am wearing, the roof over my head, a warm place to be etc..
Look around your present place and find something you feel gratitude for: something you feel abundant about. It can be something you have a lot of, like books, dishes it can be a lot of sunlight.
Focus on that feeling of the vibration, just hold that feeling for as long as you like, this will break the obsessive negative thoughts and bring you back to the present moment, anytime you feel gratitude and appreciation you are manifesting more things to feel gratitude and appreciation for, when you feel love towards anything you are manifesting more love.
Once you do this; let all thoughts go, don’t give it any more attention.
You can’t manifest money with worry . worry only increases the momentum of not having, remember anytime you feel hate you’re manifesting more things to hate, anytime you feel like a victim, you are manifesting things to feel more like a victim about.
You’re the creator of your own vibration, your vibration manifest your reality, create something good .
A manof great wealth lost all that he owned. He wept as he thought of everything he once had. He was bitter, angry, and unhappy as he moved his things to that small-place with only a place to cook, and a room for a bed. Everyone heard the news and thought” how sad, him losing his large home, and many treasures, he must feel horrible”.
A young family with small children lives in the street begging for food no place to sleep, the children thin, and dirty. Soon the day comes and they are able to move to a new home. It was small but has a place to cook and a place to sleep and they are grateful. Everyone hears the news and thinks “How wonderful! I am so happy for them, they must be grateful to finely have a home”.
Our ego is our story and you can always find people to agree with that story.
The future and the past have no power in the “Now” only our thoughts have the power to make us feel bad, whether you live in a mansion or only have a shopping cart you borrowed from the corner store the laws work the same and you can change your life by changing your vibration of thoughts, if you have feelings of gratitude you will continue to attract things to be grateful for . When you give up the thoughts, the stories the judgements, truly surrendering to “what is” that’s where the peace in you starts, that’s where you can start creating your reality
We’ve all heard the saying the rich get richer and poor get poorer, what do you think the rich thinks about money, probably having it, while the poor think about not having it. .. change your thoughts, vibrations, expectation and your reality will follow suit . So why did the rich man lose everything, because he kept the vibration of losing something long enough to lose it . Maybe a love loss, it doesn’t matter what the loss is, its still a vibration of losing something, having something taken away
Stay present without thought, look for anything to be grateful for, even if its a new shopping cart, I promise you will start a momentum, a vibration…that will continue to manifest things to be grateful for …dont agree with the story your mind has told you or the story your parents, friends or society have told you, focus on the abundance of love, money , security health anything you feel truly abundant about, without the babbling mind telling you different, the law of attraction is the law, and it works without fail so care about what you vibrate, because your reality is your vibration .
I had a friend once, I ask him “do you believe in god” He didn’t answer right away like he was just giving it some thought, So before he answered I said ,”do you believe in Satan”? He looked across the room at his wife and said rather quickly “yes” I said will you had better believe in God!. We both laughed. A lot of people reach for God when they are worried, or in some kind of trouble.
Doctors will tell you that their patients that pray, or have a strong belief in God, are sometimes suddenly healed, even with the grimmest of diagnosis. Many will say it’s just, a coincidence maybe a placebo effect. Whatever it is, it seems to work.
I believe that there is also a worry effect: worry and prayer are energies, one is negative one is positive, if you are worried about something you bring negative energy to it.
Why would we want to bring energy to something or someone that’s causing you worry or heartache? The things we pray for the most are also the things we worry about the most which leave us in constant turmoil things start to look good and then they turn bad, back and forth, back and forth. We pray for success, and worry about success. Worry can look like anger, fear, and frustration.
We all have lost our temper with our loved ones, caused from worry. This only brought more suffering to the situation. We have all got frustrated at our job, because we are worried about our success or lack of .
If you believe in the power of prayer than believe in the power of worry. The next time you are angry, frustrated, or irritated ask yourself, what am I worried about? And then ask yourself do I want to give this “worry” energy…? Turn that worry into positive prayer, a positive prayer is a knowing, or seeing of something already happening, and believing of it.
Thoughts create energy making us feel good or making us feel bad, energy can feed our ego or it can feed our true self either one cause emotions that cause vibrations that affect the body and create our reality .
There are 3 ways of thinking; that will lead you to suffering
1. dwelling in past
Thoughts about the past :
“Why did that happen to me, why did she leave me, I should have got that promotion, he screwed me over, my parents divorced when I was young, I was in an accident, I went through a hard time, I was attacked, I didn’t go to college” when we focus on the thought patterns:
The body reacts; with depression, crying, sadness, not wanting to do anything, blaming others for everything that goes wrong in your life, unhappiness, procrastination and health Problems might be heart disease, asthma, addiction etc..
The reality you might manifest will be more things to continue those same vibrations People will step on you, use you, jobs will pass you by, relationships will go badly and there will be little change in your life.
2. Denying the now and fighting against what is:
These thought might be “this should not be happening to me, do they know who I am, how dare them make me wait, I don’t have time for this, I can’t deal with this right now”
The body reacts with yelling, stumping feet, Being rude to people. frustration, irritation, and tension. Health problems might be headache, high blood pressure upset stomach, heart burn .
Your manifested reality will continue to bring about situations where nothing is going right, people will not want to be around you, people will cut you off in traffic, accidents will occur and mistakes will be made.
3. dwelling in thoughts of the future :
“I’ll be rich soon, tomorrow will be better, I will move up that latter soon, when the house is paid off, when we have more money, when I get my business in order, when I lose weight, someday soon, I will relax, and then I will spend time with my family, go on vacation etc.
The body reacts with worry, fear, anxiety, tension, stress, missing life, and regret. health problems may be addiction, heart conditions , high cholesterol , obesity.
Your manifested reality will continue to bring about things that get in your way, things that keep you down, worrying about things that need to be fixed, projects that never get done, missing out on life, missing out on events, cheating, relationship problems, divorce. etc…
The hardest part of changing any of these three thought patterns, outside of chronic disease is going to be addiction and I will explain why in a minute.
We cant stop thinking of the past, it’s impossible… but we don’t need to hold on to the negative energy of the past, we can use the past as a knowledge base, for useful information while still staying present we don’t need to give up our good feeling memories, but we don’t need to keep reliving our not so good memories, we can use the past for knowing what not to do, like putting your hand in a fire, we know it will burn.
We can imagine a beautiful future, while understanding there is no life in the future there’s only life in the now tomorrow will not come because tomorrow will be today again.
We can react to the now when needed, but It’s silly to think we can change what’s already happen like somehow its going to change, back up, and go in reverse.
So what can we do to stop the madness: give your thoughts awareness in other words pay attention to your thoughts and pay attention to your emotions about those thoughts meditation is a wonderful option to clear the mind if you can master it, next we need to stop labeling, naming and categorizing ourselves.
I would like to share with you the first verse of the Tao Te Ching it reads: “The Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao, The name that can be named, is not the eternal Name.” Which means we cannot be named, we are not our thoughts, someone may say, you are old, you are rich, you are poor, you are a big jerk, but that is not who we are.
A child only knows that the grass is called green, because they were taught it was called green, the true essence of the green grass cannot be named, as with the essence of your spirit it cannot be named, like an infant seeing their hand for the first time, looking at it in awe, they have no experience of it , they have not learned how to judge, label and name. When you look at a person or your self without naming, judging, labeling, you will see a very different person .
Krishnamurti once said, “When you teach a child that a bird is named ‘bird,’ the child will never see the bird the same again.
So how can we begin to choose to think in a way that serves us ? Can you change the past? can you change the future? In a sense “yes”, you can change it by changing your perspective of it. without labeling it good, bad, or unfair, giving up the fight against it.
Without preconceived perceptions, and being present in the now without judgement, without attaching and Identifying it to self or ego without preconceived ideas of what it should be. In other words unlearn your negative life experiences, put them in their place, change your perseption of them just noticing them will cause a shift in your thought patterns .
Example : Give up your idea’s of what love is, love cannot be named, it’s not a thing to be given nor received. love is like a promise you keep, give up your ideas of what success should look like, it cannot be named a mansion, gold metal, or perfect relationship. Success is something you feel its a creation, a manifestation, a feeling of accomplishment its not big or small. stop labeling your self as rich, poor, middle classed.
People are truly happiest when they are in a state of alignment, balanced in their true self leaving a feeling of peace.
As I said earlier addiction will be the hardest challenge
Addiction also can have a false feeling of being present, it often stops the thinking process, there’s many different addictions besides drugs and alcohol there’s food , hoarding, cutting yourself, etc… whatever the high addiction takes your attention away from thoughts, stimulates the ego (false self), it feel similar to being present but of coarse only momentarily . The more you drink, or take the drug the more the ego makes you think and feel present , but in reality you are so gone in the ego you can’t be present at all, alcohol gives a false sense of self many of us know the occasional drunk state, We know this later when we sober up, you might remember thinking you could dance like Saturday Night Fever, or maybe you were god’s gift to every girl or guy at the bar, or you suddenly thought you should quit your day job and become a Karaoke DJ, yes the ego has taken you over completely.
So the addiction continues, causing its own problems : resentment, abandonment, loss, and the ego’ there to tell us: depending on what kind of thinker you are
( stuck in the past kind of thinker ) “feel guilty, you’re a loser, you don’t deserve to be loved,”
(fighting the now kind of thinker ) ” I can’t cope, I’ve had a hard day , somebody screwed me over, I deserve a drink, I do it to unwind, I do it to relax.”
( stuck in the future kind of thinker) ” I can quit when I want. It’s not a problem, life is not fun without it, I’m more appealing when I’ve had a few, I don’t see a future without it” .
And the addiction goes on.
Practicing, staying present will help you give up the addiction, you’ll have a clearer perspective of it, you’ll notice the reality of it, understanding it’s intentions
What is an addiction: Its a lie, its false, its like a person masqueraded as a friend, a friend making you feel better, a friend that’s always there for you, all along secretly trying to destroy your life, whether or not you are lost in thought or in addiction its keeping you from manifesting the life you were meant to have, the life you deserve, the life you were here to create.
with less suffering there wont be the need for addiction and self medicating . Start by paying attention to your ” thoughts’ the longer you practice the easier it gets starting with things that are not stressful like at home in the shower relaxing, try enjoying something without thought, when you notice you are thinking in one of these thought pattern. example: you are in the shower and you notice you are thinking about being at work, that would be a future thought or you notice you are thinking about someone that pissed you off the day before, that would be a past thought, maybe you notice a fighting the now thought like “I need to hurry up” or feeling irritated that you for got to get a towel, “I’m going to be late “.
As you notice these thoughts don’t beat your self up that would be fighting the now its already happen let it go .
The good part of noticing these thinking patterns are that once you put awareness on the thoughts they go away and the more you do this the more you get better at staying present . And being present you’ll start to see things as you have never seen them before, later you will be able to do it walking through a busy mall, and soon you’ll start to feel true peace not the imaginary false peace of addictions.
Give up the thoughts, stay present as much and as long as you can, stop dwelling on the past, the future, stop resisting the now, be present without judgment once you find the appreciation of the moment, the momentum of appreciation will increase and it will get easier and easier to find appreciation in the now, in the present moment, and the addiction will no longer control you.
The best things in life are created from a present mind, we manifest things we want.
Any creative thing in this world, a song, a great painting, a great movie script, anything that last in this world came from being present in creating . And that is why we love music, movies, painting, and other creative things, even creative places. We love activities that take presence like sports, rock climbing, things that take focus are appealing to people. We love sunsets, trees, blue skies, mountains , storms, snow and rain. These things are the creative presence of the universe.
People find cures, love, fame, success, by accident or just by being present enough to notice an opportunity . Your car breaks down and someone stops to help you, suddenly you’ve met the love of your life. You find a rock, keep it as a pet, the idea sells, you make millions, food is left out and Penicillin is discovered and saves millions of lives. Many of our most important discoveries were found accidentally, discoveries just presented themselves, and the person that discovered it was just present enough to notice it, present enough to see the value in it. present enough to appreciate it . Be present and see what you … notice.
Life flows like a song with, energy, vibration waves of sound… and like a song it has many parts. If you focus on the part of the piano, drums, or just the vocals you miss the flow, you miss the message of the sound together as a whole.
Think of your song as thoughts
Sometime the song / thought makes you happy, and some days may trigger a memory that makes you sad . The good news is just by changing your thought you change your song Don’t play the same song that brings you down over and over. Let go of that song, the old love song that makes you sad. Let go of those songs.
The first time you hear a new song of course, it’s unfamiliar to you, you’re not sure if you’re going to like it, but then suddenly it’s your new favorite song, you can’t wait to hear it, you listen to it over and over again so choose the songs that make you feel good.
let your day flow…like a song and make it a song that makes everyone around you feel good, a song that makes them want to sing along. Don’t make your song so serious that when you sing out of key you forget to laugh. As you go through your day let the song of your life flow, and remember if you don’t like the song your life is playing, change the song !
Our songs won’t always be happy songs…
Is happiness something we all want all the time? when we open a gift we might show excitement, joy, and happiness. But going around everyday like that?. That would really annoy everyone around you. You know that person… that’s so happy you want to hit him.
Sometimes life is like opening a gift, and sometimes like getting your car towed. The trick is not to let, getting your car towed, upset you so much you miss the gift. So good song, bad song, sad song. If you resist the rhythm! your song will be distorted .
Simply go with the flow let your song play, sing along, or just change the song
There is a universal language it’s not English or Spanish. The universe doesn’t speak different languages. The universal language is feelings and emotions. If you want to attract something in your life you need to ask for it with emotion, like a prayer. If you want a new home, send out the thoughts, and emotions of already owning a home.
If you’re worried about paying bills… Worry being a strong emotion. The universe will abide and say… yes,! here are bills to pay. Thoughts create feelings and your feelings attract things.
When an infant is born we do everything for them of coarse they have no skills yet they know only to cry out for help but as they get a little older and start to reach out its important that we don’t help so much we let them challenge their self, you may think they are struggling to reach a toy but look closer they are wiggling, grunting, but not crying out for help. Its the parents that moves the toy closer for them taking away the challenge, no one wants to win a game because someone let them win . By doing this the child learns a new challenge and that’s to get you to do it for them .
With this being the child’s experience they may become the small child stomping their feet demanding their parents to give them what they want. This creates a faults sense of self the ego, with the ego saying “yes I need help here, how dare you not give me what I need” I can’t do this on my own” and the parent’s ego agrees, “yes I should do everything for this child, This child is my child… different from your child !”. And the ego is passed down like a bad gene.
We start to compare our parenting skills to our own parents; The ego tells us ” My parents didn’t ever help me, I had it tough, if my parents had stayed together, if my parents loved me more.”, and your ego tells you yes’,” I’m a better parent then my parents were”.
Most of us were un- taught to be present held captive by our parents ego, brain washed and given an ego of our own . and some may never get back to presence, until they are close to death. They say that most kids by age 8 have already developed the ego, and lost their awareness of the now, they no longer look at the world the same; they may start to judge, and label. They start to develop their stories; “I shouldn’t be treated like this, she is ugly, I am ugly, I need, I don’t have, I want, they don’t like me, I am this way because…. , I have a rights!… I have an illness, my parents are divorced, it’s my teachers fault, I am better then you”.
We came in this world in the NOW and will leave in the NOW
Imagine seeing life with such presence, it’s like seeing everything for the first time but with the practical knowledge needed to function.
Being focused makes people feel alive it brings them peace, everything starts to align in their life It’s almost magic, we suddenly know what to do, where to go, and life starts to line up for you.
Without focus, without being conscious, we never fully become ourselves. The Bible says an eye for an eye, which means what you put out you get back, negative energy out, negative results back.
Thinking is energy , positive thinking leads to positive results, but above thinking is a place where awareness live’s A place where the false self/ ego cannot survive. This is the place where we find peace and comfort. this place is ” NOW” A place we are born with the knowledge of but most have lost sight of .
Grass needs only sun and water lots and lots of water, our bodies are the same; without water we shrivel up become dry, our skin and hair look old. The longer we go without water the more we become sick with disease. Everything on earth is made up of water. They say to drink half your weight in ounces. Along with feeding your body, sea salt, fruits, and vegetables.
Like a garden; seeds planted in good dirt full of minerals, water and sunshine will grow beautiful healthy food, as with humans it’s the same if you don’t have the sun, water, and minerals, it won’t matter what food you put in the body we cant digest the right nutrition… keep your garden free of weeds giving space to flourish with ease, So is the same for your body without weeding out stress, giving your body space to relax, our body cannot digest and flourish good health.
Like the tree; with strong roots, can weather the winds, bending and swaying in harmony so can we learn to get along and stay will rooted.
A flower, what gives it such beauty… fragile, but strong enough to break thru the heavy earth? We enjoy gazing upon it without intention, not needing of it for food, just the enjoyment of its smell, and beauty. What flower struggles or worries to grow? We too can live like the lilies.
Listening is a skill taking practice, trying to listen without thought… can be difficult, most people are just waiting to respond, only hearing a piece of what the other is saying.
The other person hasn’t even finished a sentence and we’re thinking of our response, most times butting in way before they are even finished speaking, we just can’t contain ourselves, blurting out our opinion.. especially if its some good gossip.
You might be very surprised when truly listening, in fact… you may think you never even knew that person before! Its especially hard listening to family members, this is because we tend to think we already know what they are going to say.
They say the number one cause of divorce is lack of communication, witch really means! lack of listening . Many married couples that have been together for years end in divorce, because they haven’t listen to each other in years and really don’t even know each other anymore, we’re not the same people we were years ago. However if you ask a couple while their still getting along in their relationship, they will say things like …we can read each others minds or I know them better then they know their selves. When really we’re just in the habit of not listening… we don’t know who we are so we just hope the other half does.
To listen without the intention of responding is to truly listen, pay close attention to yourself, Are you listening or are you thinking and judging and waiting to respond. While the other is talking, are you thinking stuff like …” I know what you’re going to say, and the answer is no!, your lying to me, I heard this before!, I hate that shirt you’re wearing. you don’t know what the hell your talking about, how long are you going to go on about it .”
Our teenage children can be very difficult to listen to, they are changing who they are every day, so its very important to listen without judgment , their not a 6 year old anymore If your teenage child says “I want to go to my friends house on Saturday night” before they even said “friends house” you already are thinking ” she is asking me “can I drop out of school, do drugs and have a child out of wedlock “.
Regardless If you try to hide thoughts in the conversation, thinking is an energy… and any negativity in our thoughts are going to be in your conversations by vibrations.
When we meet a new person we tend to start thinking and judging from the moment we lay eyes on them. We are sizing them up, comparing them to ourselves, labeling, judging. “She’s good looking, I hate her, what is she thinking wearing that! she seem so phony, “, the hole time shaking their hand and mechanically introducing yourself.
You haven’t a clue what their name is, you have been busy thinking.
We also tend to do the same to ourselves when meeting people we start judging ourselves “I cant compete with these people, they seem much more better, richer, etc . I feel out of place here, I should have worn the other out fit, he is more successful then me, their house is nicer, newer.
We all do this and so its seems to be normal but it doesn’t have to be. it only causes suffering and we miss out on opportunities, friendships, marriage.
Being present without thought can be very difficult at first, but with practice it becomes easier and even addicting …presence is being at peace. and peace is being happy.
We all long for peace. which is probably why a lot of people have addictions…drugs, alcohol can feel like “presence” we tend to feel quite at ease when we have a few drinks in us. alcohol simulates “presence” if you have ever been intoxicated you may remember feeling at peace telling someone you just met how much you love them, talking to strangers like your best friends making plans to do things the next day. and later thinking what was I thinking!! . Drugs and alcohol are illusions of ” presence” that’s what makes them so addicting. people can also become addicted to things that make you become alert, present, aware, like riding a motorcycle. while riding you are more present because its somewhat an adrenaline rush and our primal instincts tell us to be alert, mountain climbing, jumping out of planes.
Working out at the gym can simulate the fight or flight feeling which makes you feel alert and closer to feeling present. Being truly present means having an awareness of the moment. Controlling your thinking you are then able to drink or climb a mountain because you enjoy it…not because you are addicted and want to escape your thinking.
Even watching TV can keep us from our own minds, its very addicting to lose yourself in a movie .
Your body does not know the difference of a movie or real life it reacts with the same vibration, example a sad movie will make you cry, a happy make you laugh and feel good , a drama will make you feel angry. So pay attention to your thoughts and your bodies response, along with listening to those around you listen to your thinking, awareness is all that’s needed .